Hip Daddy

08 25

Top 5 Reasons Why Water Parks Are Kinda Gross.

Okay, so we’ve been to a few and feel the need to throw down some commentary on all things water park.  And unfortunately for the most part, it ain’t pretty.  As a Hip Daddy, it’s important you find the right balance to meeting your child’s every demand and wish with doing what is actually right for them, despite tantrums, outbursts, general hatred, etc.  Water parks are a hot topic come summer time and so likely many of you know how the conversation goes…and ends.  Well, let’s talk.  Here are the Hip Daddy Top 5 Reasons Why Water Parks Are Kinda Gross:

1.) Floating Used Band Aides Are Never a Good Thing.

This means kids, adults have somewhat of an ‘oweee’ or a blister or a scrape or a wart or a deep wound that at one point, bled, which required the bandaid.  Yeah, you get it.  Hello disease center.  A Hip Daddy Must Have before entering any water park? Make sure the kids shots are updated (and yours too.)

2.) Chicken Nuggets and French Fries in a Wave Pool Can’t Be Right?

Seriously, the food can be a problem.  Some of these people bring their coolers and all sorts of crap to the ‘park’ and of course, the food naturally ends up in many unfortunate areas…such as the water.  Imagine that.  And let us tell you, getting hit in the face by not only a big wave in the wave pool but also a f*&ckin chicken tender can be not so pleasant.

3.) Feet and More Feet From All Walks of Life.

It’s simply gross.  Look at some of the people, then look at their feet.  Then go throw up in the bathroom, grab your child, and run for the exits…#itsthatsimple.

4.) Um…the rafts…

Used, and more used.  And used again.  Chest to chest, back to back, cheek to cheek, skin to skin.  Yup…repeat the above.

5.) When the ‘Lazy River’ Is Green and Murky.

The concept of a “Lazy River” sounds so enjoyable.  But in execution, they can be a high traffic item at a water park, with a very structured water way path…meaning, no place for all the ‘stuff’ to really go to…hence, some of these ‘rivers’ are colored in certain ways that by all means is not the beautiful color of the peaceful river experience you might expect.  Stay away.  If you really need this experience, find a raft and pool and be on your way….or better yet, find a real river.

Alright, alright, why does Hip Daddy have to hate on the water park life? Well, okay, we actually find water parks to be very fun in the moment with the kids, but it’s the aftermath part that really gets us thinking 🙂  Sorry, but they are in general, kinda gross #sorrynotsorry.